Love in Action: Remembering bell hooks

How do we heal a hurting world?  

Bell hooks believed the answer lies in practicing love as a radical act. Hooks was a passionate educator, a brilliant scholar, and a deeply influential writer. This February, the month of love, let us reflect on the profound life lessons she offered about the act of loving. The life and work of the late bell hooks continues to inspire all who have encountered her groundbreaking ideas. As a trailblazing Black feminist, she fearlessly challenged the whiteness, heterosexism, and classism often embedded in mainstream feminism. Hooks led with love for community, embodying the essence of a true revolutionary; unafraid to confront the status quo or critique the white establishment, including white feminists. Her work lovingly urges us to think more deeply and strive to become better versions of ourselves, not just for our own benefit but for the well-being of our families and communities. She understood our intrinsic interconnectedness; how the self and society are intertwined and emphasized that when theory is transformed into the flesh, it creates the possibility for healing and collective action. 

Love, as bell hooks taught us, is not simply an emotion; it is a practice, a commitment, and a radical force for change. Her work challenges us to ask: What does it mean to truly love? How can love transform not just our personal lives but also our communities? It is through love that we begin to see one another fully, to break down barriers of fear and oppression, and to build a world rooted in justice. Being introduced to hooks’ work is like walking into an enlightening and illuminating portal, a doorway into newfound possibilities. Hooks lovingly challenges us to question our relationship to the art of loving; whether it is from All About Love or Communion:  The Female Search for Love or perhaps the profound writing of The Will to Change: Men Masculinity and Love, there are gems for all those that want to learn to love wholeheartedly.   

Romantic Love/Maternal Love 

It is important to consider the context and culture of the lessons we learn about love. Hooks asserted that much of what we were taught about love was shaped by patriarchal thinking. This profound truth helps uncover one of the core beliefs many internalize about love; that it was taught to be hierarchical. Love, as American culture teaches us, comes with power dynamics. At the top of this pyramid was romantic love, particularly for women; where social value of love was tied to men more particularly fathers and husbands. All other forms of love whether friendship, self-love, or community love were seen as not as significant. Romantic love, especially when attached to husbands, carried the most social value and power. Closely following romantic love in this structure was maternal love. Many never make the connection between these two relationships: romantic and maternal love and their deeply patriarchal roots. Women who were single, unmarried, or who either chose not to have children or were unable to, were often viewed as incomplete or lacking in some fundamental way.  

These weren’t explicit rules, but they were embedded in historical and cultural norms; silent but powerful forces shaping how love was understood and experienced. Currently, in today’s culture, much of the younger generation love so freely. They are not as bound by the patriarchal pressures of yesterday and can dream and live beyond the hierarchy. This includes the crucial act of loving oneself.  

Self-Love  

Hooks reminds us to come back home to ourselves. She insists on reminding us of our value as people, as human beings, without the requirement of being in relationship with spouses or children but that our value is intrinsic. Self-love is fundamental for our well-being and our relationships. We are the common denominator in all our relationships. Loving ourselves is the best investment we can give ourselves and others, giving others our abundant self. This is not selfish, but it is rather being full of self. Love is found in the courageous decision to believe in oneself despite overwhelming odds, choosing to love themselves into new possibilities. It is in their determination to break cycles of pain. In this pain we find that friends emerge like bright stars in the dark night.  

Friendship love  

Bell hooks’ work reminds us of the profound importance of friendship love. Hooks claims that community is as important as the individual, and friendship is the foundation of a community of care. Friendship love was often seen as important but undeniably less valuable than the love between marrieds. Friends were thought to serve a purpose but not the purpose. 

Many women began to challenge this notion and deeply value the love of friends. We discovered that, in times of great need, a dear friend could stand by our side, call to check on us when we were “too” quiet, invite us to holiday dinner during a divorce, or listen to our messy lives without judgment, just acceptance and love. 

Women, as a gender category, statistically, are often less lonely than their male counterparts. Over the years, women have learned to highly value platonic love. Observe how female friendships love each other; it is life-giving, a medicine for the spirit. Thanks to early feminist scholars, particularly women of color feminists like bell hooks, younger generations are now encouraged to expand their understanding of love. No longer must we place love on a hierarchy of social worth. Where there are friends there is a warm community.  

Community Love: Love as a Transformative Agent 

Bell hooks calls us to embrace love as a transformative force; a power that can move us toward healing and justice. When we deeply engage with this noble concept, we learn to “see” others more fully, to extend compassion to ourselves, and to treat others with greater care and dignity. Love, when understood as an active choice and a guiding principle, can shift not only personal trajectories but collective realities. 

In times of crisis, love shines in remarkable ways. During the devastating Southern California fires, love emerged in the actions of strangers who arrived faster than governments, offering water, clothing, shelter, and warm embraces to those in need. During ICE sightings & sweeps in the Central Valley, love rose in solidarity against fear. Entire communities, gripped by uncertainty and terror, find hope in the voices of advocates and activists and the collective strength of neighbors who demand justice. Together, they embody an undeniable truth: love, as an action, defies division and reminds us of our interconnectedness. 

In moments like these, love becomes a great mobilizer. It lifts us beyond fear and tragedy, compelling us to see the light in one another. Even as strangers, we are moved to act by the unshakable connection we share. These moments remind us, however fleetingly, that we belong to one another in profound and transformative ways. Love has the power to shatter boundaries, transcend limits, and propel us toward a future defined by deep connection. It renders irrelevant the barriers we once thought defined us.  

As we face a presidency that openly and unapologetically dehumanizes groups of people, let us not despair. Let us embrace the radical teachings of bell hooks, who reminds us that love is more than an emotion; it is a choice, an action, and a “practice of freedom”. Her writings, such as All About Love, challenge us to examine how we love ourselves, our communities, and even those we perceive as "other." Hooks believed that when we engage love as a radical force, we reclaim our humanity and forge pathways to justice. We will need one another in the days to come. Let love, as a verb, lead the way back to our shared humanity. Together, we can create a world where love, when practiced collectively and with intention, becomes the foundation of liberation.  

Let us act boldly. 

Let us act lovingly  

And, let us act now. 

In Love and Solidarity,

Melanie